o you have a question relating to how to improve communication with your partner?

We often have little selfless and loving things we do for each other when we first meet.  Things we know make our partner happy, such as bringing your wife or girlfriend roses on a Friday.  Or, giving your partner a shoulder massage after a rough day at work.  Perhaps, a little note in their briefcase, or lipstick on the mirror in poem expressing our love to our partner, might be just the touch to say "I love you."  Do we still do these things?  If not, why not?  

I remember when my sister met her husband to be, and how I first saw them together.   

She took me to Cal Poly to run an errand with her, just to spend time as brother and sister.  I remember she made a point to park in front of David's house.  He wasn't home when we parked.  When we returned to the car, she found a note David had left for her!  He wasn't sure it was her car, but wrote that he hoped she'd drop in and say "hello."  

Well, not long that, I was shouting in David's ear at a football game. A couple of years later, and many love letters between David and my sister, and David became my brother (in-law). My whole family simply loves the man, and pretty much did from the start. Once, Terri was in Hawaii for a mission she worked on, and while she was gone, he wrote her numerous letters. I remember he had a little pet name for her, which I thought was goofy (aren't most pet names -- love is about being silly, too). But, she loved it.  

I still see them do things for each other. They've been married for about twenty years and are about to adopt a new baby in just two months! Imagine the strength of relationship an adoption requires. That strength is founded on their respect.

We can improve our relationship, today, through showing our partner more respect. The little things do matter, after all. 

By following this guidance, and other tips in Smooth Sailing, we hope you are able to build the relationship of your dreams. 

Please note:  the author of this article may not be certified as a licensed psychotherapist -- please consult professional assistance as your situation dictates.